Welcome to the inside of my head.

Posts tagged ‘fail’

I told you so

So my dad thinks he can fix/fit/install anything and to give him credit, 9 times out of 10, he can. It just takes him a long long time.

Yesterday the weather was lovely so he decided it would be the perfect opportunity to fit the new window for our living room (which has been sitting in our garage for the best part of year).

It was all going so well. We removed the glass from the original window, walloped the edges of the window (I got to help with this – so satisfying) and painstakingly removed the window frame. Then we hauled the new window into place and secured it. Next was putting in the new glass.

To secure the glass you need to clip some stuff around the edges, almost like a border. However my dad wanted to put some ‘packers’ in first (learning the lingo) except he needed to remind himself how to do it so went off to watch a YouTube tutorial (I can’t make this up).

Meanwhile the glass is literally secured by the act of gravity and some duct tape. I warned my dad that this was too flimsy and he was adamant that it would be fine.

I kid you not. 15 minutes later, a gust of wind resulted in the glass crashing onto the floor, shards everywhere.

I learnt that my fight or flight response is screaming. Like a banshee.

I spent the rest of evening cleaning up and hoovering glass. Think I deserve an award for not telling my dad ‘I told you so’.

Given we didn’t want to get burgled, my dad installed the broken window (one side was still miraculously intact) and slept downstairs with a bat.

 

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ePIC FAil

I GOT THE DATE OF MY DATE WRONG. AND HE KNOWS THAT I GOT IT WRONG.

I AM SO MORTIFIED.

WHAT IS MY LIFE.

IT IS NEXT SATURDAY.

Shame

So I usually find myself writing/rambling when my feelings are all over the place. I guess this is one of those times.

I got the results from my second sitting of the actuarial exams yesterday. I passed one and I failed one. Let me clarify that; I, Aliya Khalid, who has never really failed anything before, failed an exam. So this whole thing has been a rather novel experience.

I’m fairly accepting that I failed this exam. I knew it was borderline and I have a hundred excuses to justify it but the honest truth is, I should have prepared more. No, the part I was worried about was how my parents would react. I must have asked them a dozen times:

‘How would you react if I failed an exam?’

‘Yeah but you didn’t.’

‘But what if I did?’

And now, this was my great opportunity to find out.

I thought it was my mum I should worry about and that my dad would take it on my chin. I couldn’t be more wrong if I tried (I must be really off my game).

My mum was perfect; the poster ad for supportive parent. It’ll be fine; you were busy at work; we went to the wedding in Scotland days before your exam; you can sit it later; this won’t hold you back; it’ll be fine. And I thought great- what was I worrying about- now I just need to tell my dad.

Do you know what he said?

‘I’m so disappointed.’

It was like being doused with cold water.

Disappointed? I haven’t put a foot wrong (academically) like ever and the ONE TIME that I mess up a little bit, I’m a disappointment. That’s fucking great.

He topped it off with ‘so all your other friends passed that exam? What went wrong with you? Why did you sit the exam if you weren’t ready? Oh so over 50% of the people who took the exam passed- that makes it
worse.’

I feel furious and hurt and more than a little betrayed. It is easy to be on someone’s side when things are going well but it is a mark of character to stay on their side when things aren’t.

I never expected that from my dad in a million years.

How Not To Flirt

So the guy I like asked me what I thought of his face. I could have said anything; I could have said that he has a very nice face, (what looks like) smooth skin and that he has a cheeky grin. 

So many flattering comments I could have made…

Instead I said “if I squint and tilt my head and the lighting is just right, your face looks mildly okay”. 

He replied “I hate you”. 

I don’t know whether I deserve a round of applause or a slap. 

Breaking into my house

So we recently took up the opportunity to buy the house directly next door to us. No one has lived in it for 20 years. Opening the door feels like opening a time capsule. The decor, the furniture, everything is so so old. It needs a lot of work; the whole thing is a mess. The roof needs fixing. The central heating needs updating. The God damn bath tub is made out of cast iron. And the garden is basically a network of homocidal stinging nettles.

This week we have focused on central heating. The way it was originally set up is actually illegal now because it is so inefficient. They didn’t even separate the supply from the return which is plumbing 101. Anyway this entire week I have been dashing from one house to the next fetching tools and keeping my poor dad hydrated and engergised. This means opening and closing the shoddy front door several times a day. This door is so dodgy and awkward that you have to kick it (hard) in just the right place or it won’t open. This evening however the door threw a strop and didn’t budge even after we nearly broke our legs smashing it. We were essentially locked out of our house.

What to do?

It’s pitch black outside but we need to get back in. We got a ladder and climbed onto the kitchen extension roof and walked across to next door. From here we had access to the bathroom window. But of course it was too small for my dad to get through.

Guess who had to pull her sorry arse ungracefully through this damn window in pitch darkness and land on friggin floorboard with nails poking out.

That’s right, me.

My butt hurts.

Just Aliya Things

I would just like to share the fact that I accidentally sprayed eau de toilette on my underarms instead of deodorant because I am fail. On the plus side my underarms smell hella fine. On the downside I look like a weirdo sniffing my underarms.

144. Basically the entire student population right now.

*sweeps away books*

*rips up notes*

*runs out into the sun arms outstretched*