Welcome to the inside of my head.

Posts tagged ‘meme’

141. Pick up lines so bad they’re good.

T’is Valentines day. Instead of roses or mush or complaining about how unromantic my day will be, I hope the following absurdly awful pick up lines will make you laugh (or cringe) (or both).

Honesty is an admirable quality.

 

I’d take this as a huge compliment.

 

The speech bubble kills me every time.

I genuinely think this is so smooth.

Lol ‘be here in 10 minutes’

Quite possibly my favourite pick up line ever.

This makes the mathematician in me very happy.

My most romantic relationship right now is probably with my wifi <3.

*snort*

The picture of David Tenant is also a very welcome addition.

*giggle*

I’m so easily pleased.

Over and Out!

Advertisements

130. #Blogger Problems

I can’t be the only one.

  1. Spend three hours writing a post. 3 likes. Spend 20 minutes writing a post. 20 likes.
  2. Getting annoyed because the WordPress reader preview ends just before the part where your post gets interesting.
  3. Spend ages writing a post but decide not to publish that day. Re-read the next day and decide it’s crap.
  4. Write what you think is an amazing post only to read one by someone else on the same topic that is miles better than your own.
  5. Write an absolutely fabulous post. 2 likes. Read one on the same topic by someone else that’s not as entertaining as yours. 50 likes.
  6. Spend half an hour writing a post. Spend the next hour on formatting and deciding which images should accompany it.
  7. Write an awesome post but can’t for the life of you come up with a good enough title for it.
  8. Your post was viewed 20 times. No-one liked it.
  9. Asking a question to your readers in your post. No-one replies.
  10. You want to rant about someone but then realise you can’t because they read your blog.
  11. Always getting lots of ideas for posts when you have no time to write and then getting writer’s block when you do finally have time.
  12. Trying to avoid this: ‘Heyy how was the party/internship/cool experience?’ ‘Read my blog’.

Over and Out!

81. Beetroot Juice

Recently my Mum has been obsessed with beetroot. She thinks we should all start chowing it down because it’s so good for us. Now I’m not averse to a bit of beetroot (and every time I eat some, I simply have to look in the mirror and check how red my tongue is) but I have limits. One of those limits is beetroot juice… hot beetroot juice.

My mum asked me to drink some and I was like:

Do you want to see me puke it up on the carpet? First off, it stinks. Secondly it looks like blood. Thirdly it was hot.

After I said no, my mum was like DRINK IT. DRINK IT NOW. What was the point of asking me if you were just going to force it upon me anyway?! I’m 21 years old and my mum can still make me to drink crap I don’t want to drink.

I reluctantly picked up the cup and pretended to take a gulp. Clearly my acting skills are not up to par because my mum knew straight away. She left me the whole cup and a threat: ‘this better be finished when I come back’.

I searched the room looking for a way out.

  1. I couldn’t drain it down the sink- Mum was in the kitchen.
  2. I couldn’t give it to the plants- their leaves would turn red.
  3. I couldn’t randomly take a stroll in the garden and accidentally drop it in the grass- Mum would be suspicious.

I was stuck.

I had to drink it.