Welcome to the inside of my head.

Posts tagged ‘truth’

163. Lies At Work

Now that I’ve been working for 10 months and being a real adult and that, I feel it is time to share some common lies at the office. leggo

What they say: This should take about an hour.
The reality: This will take at least two hours

What they say: Hey, do you have time to job a quick job for me?
The reality: You’re doing this job for me. And chances are it’s not quick.

What they say: While I’m here, I’d like to talk to you about xyz.
The reality: I came here to take to you about xyz.

What they say: Oh, you’re leaving at 5? Good for you.
The reality: You must not have enough work to do. Let me rectify that.

What they say: Thank you for sending that over. Could you also provide xyz?
The reality: I couldn’t care less what you just sent over because it was not what I wanted. Send me what I want dammit.  

What they say: Oh you did that quickly!
The reality: You must have done something wrong.

What they say: I just made a few changes.
The reality: I changed fucking everything.

What they say: Please let me know if you have any questions.
The reality: For the love of god please don’t ask me anything.

What they say: I’d like to request leave on xyz.
The reality: I don’t care what you say. I’m going. This email is a formality.

What they say: Hey how’s that piece of work coming along?
The reality: I wanted it 2 hours ago. What is taking so long?

What they say: What’s your capacity like?
The reality: I have some work for you.

What they say: Hey how’s it going?
The reality: I have some work for you.

What they say: Did you have a good weekend?
The reality: I have some work for you.

See a trend here?

Over and Out!

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161. Working Life: The Sucky Truth.

So in that last post where I said I hoped to still keep up with my blog- yeah that didn’t happen. I can only apologise. I’m guilty. I chose sleep over blogging. Disgraceful.

So what the hell have I been doing? The daily grind covers it- the getting up, going to work, commuting home and collapsing in bed routine.

People ask me all the time how my job is going and I smile and say it’s good and that I’m being kept busy.

But here is what I really want to say.

I have caught myself questioning working life a hundred times over the past month.

The first, and it makes me sad to say this is, is this it? Is this what my life is going to be… 40 years of a daily 9-5  (let’s be honest 8.30-6) and catching up on sleep on the weekend. There’s got to be more, surely.

Then there’s WHAT I’m doing. I like that I’m being given responsibility and I’m doing something ‘real’ but I’m basically a glorified Excel person. Spreadsheets and Outlook are my two sidekicks.

Sometimes I feel like such a sellout. I picked such a ‘safe’, ‘stable’ career. I’ve been so busy being realistic about the future that I never sat down to actually ask myself what I wanted to do. I stumbled into this with my eyes closed and my fingers crossed and a mantra that it’ll work out. And you know what, it probably will. I just need to adjust and grab any opportunity to do non-standard stuff. But for now I’m going to moan because I bloody well want to.

I also worry about my time, more specifically the lack of it. What’s the point of earning money if you don’t have time to use it?  I am quickly beginning to realise that there are not enough hours in the day for me to do all the things I want, and this makes me feel bitter. I want to see my family, chat to my friends, keep up to date with all my tv shows, listen to all the new music and spend hours exploring YouTube and WordPress. But I can’t. And I think it sucks.

And the bit that shocks me is that I’m lucky. I can come home and my parents take such good care of me. How do people living alone function? When do they find the time to go food shopping or cook? How do parents drum up the energy to entertain their kids and keep up to date?

The way I see it…if you let it, work will suck you in and take over your life. I need to prioritise what is really important and do enough things in my personal life so that I don’t lose my identity.

I need to remind myself that I am so much more than just an employee.